STDs, Shame, and the Sabbath: Orthodox Jews Reflect on How They Learned About Sex

STDs, Shame, and the Sabbath: Orthodox Jews Reflect on How They Learned About Sex

In considering issues relating to the conversion of non-Jews to Judaism, Orthodox Jews tend to defend a strict policy that we term the halakhic approach [one that strictly follows traditional Jewish law]. Conversion for the sole purpose of marriage is highly discouraged. Conversion when the non-Jew does not intend to observe halakhah in full is generally considered to be no conversion at all. Rabbi Melech Schachter, in a fine article on conversion, states what most Orthodox Jews believe:. The traditional stringency is not the only halakhically valid approach available to us; on the contrary, this may be the proper time to rely on other halakhic standards. No one will argue that conversion to Judaism for other than spiritual reasons is ideal. Certainly it should be discouraged. However, in terms of practical reality we may have to be more tolerant of such conversions. In his response, Rabbi Uziel opens with a quotation from the Shulhan Arukh Yoreh Deah, , which states that we must examine a potential convert to determine if his motives for accepting Judaism are sincere.

Growing Up Orthodox and Coming to Terms with Interfaith Dating

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Modern orthodox jewish dating – Want to meet eligible single woman who share your zest for life? Indeed, for those who’ve tried and failed to find the right man.

The religious Jewish dating scene is severely broken. In the secular world men and women date by meeting each other at co-ed institutions like school and University or at events like parties and weekend getaways. They begin to date and the relationship unfolds gradually and organically as they get to know each other better over time.

This is not to say that all things are hunky-dory. There are major problems in this model, like the fact that pretty girls and overtly successful guys are going to get noticed over those with quieter and subtler virtues. Likewise, sex has come to play such a prominent role in secular dating that couples get to know each other physically rather than emotionally, creating distance and a lack of real intimacy in relationships.

But in the religious world where dating is so often dependent on third parties making introductions, young men and women are at the mercy of others to meet a potential spouse. Those third-parties are often professional matchmakers or friends who set them up. The flaw in this model is that first, it disempowers men and women from meeting directly and creates instead a dependency on those who are not principals in the dating.

Mormons and Jews: What 2 Religions Say About the Modern Dating Crisis

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Most Orthodox Jews date explicitly for the goal of marriage rather than for if an Orthodox man refuses to grant a “get,” or bill of Jewish divorce.

Emily Harris. Matchmakers are the traditional way to find a mate in the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community to which Mizrachi belongs. But she is not entirely traditional. Mizrachi is part of a growing number of ultra-Orthodox Jews in Israel who are seeking job skills, getting higher education or joining the military. And those changes are shaking up the community’s established customs for finding a spouse. On a practical level, to Mizrachi, being “modern ultra-Orthodox” means she wears long sleeves and long skirts, but also drives — something unmarried women in her community normally do not do.

She won’t attend mixed parties but bucked tradition by getting undergraduate and master’s degrees in social work. Most ultra-Orthodox women in Israel only finish religious high school. Mizrachi’s parents, who became ultra-Orthodox as adults, supported her college education, she says, but others did not. Many of the changes among ultra-Orthodox come from political and social pressure from other parts of Israeli society.

I Married a Jew

Duis autem vel eum iriure dolor in hendrerit in vul esse molestie consequat vel illum veridolore eu fer feugiat eorum claritatem nulla Follow Us. Modern orthodox jewish dating. Wruble, from my husband’s orthodox christian dating online dating game.

Modern Orthodox children aren’t as sheltered from secular life the way some more I was no longer Orthodox and I was dating a non-Jewish guy who was older.

I have a question about shidduch dating. How is it possible that within the space of a few weeks and only a few dates a couple can get engaged? In modern secular dating couples may live together for a year or two before deciding to marry, and yet in traditional Jewish dating they never even live together and get married within months of meeting! From personal experience and anecdotal evidence, it seems to work.

But how? Boy meets girl at a party. They like each other.

In Orthodox Dating Scene, Matchmakers Go Digital

For more observant Jews, foregoing foreskin is just one of many rules and customs that govern how and when a couple can canoodle. And while the Torah Part I of the Bible for all you goyem does make certain prescriptions for how and when you get to know each other biblically, certain cultural customs vary between — and often within — sects. No matter where they may or may not stand on Christ, fans of the the Old Testament and New join ranks with just about every religious sect by disapproving of premarital sex.

Orthodoxy, like Christians, Muslims, and other Judaic sects, dictates abstinence before the covenant of marriage Many of the practices around sex relate back to the principle of modesty, which is big in Orthodoxy.

As Jon Birger wrote in his book “Date-Onomics: How Dating However, the bigger issue for a modern Orthodox single woman may not.

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Hey Baby, What’s Your Sinai?

Interfaith marriage in Judaism also called mixed marriage or intermarriage was historically looked upon with very strong disfavour by Jewish leaders, and it remains a controversial issue among them today. In the Talmud and all of resulting Jewish law until the advent of new Jewish movements following the Jewish Enlightenment, the ” Haskala “, marriage between a Jew and a gentile is both prohibited, and also void under Jewish law.

The Talmud holds that a marriage between a Jew and a non Jew is both prohibited and also does not constitute a marriage under Jewish law. Interfaith marriage between a Jew and a non Jew is not even permitted in case of Pikuach nefesh.

In another instance, a man who was married for less than three years and For the most part though, our modern cultural milestones tend to.

The couple, who married four days earlier, sit side-by-side at the kitchen table in their new Harlem apartment. Rain slides down the window overlooking a courtyard of snaking vines that makes the place feel far from the hustle and bustle of New York City. Navigating this paradigm while chasing a film career supplied a gold mine of artistic fodder for a web series shedding light on a group that rarely gets screen time. The comedic web series, which launched in , follows six single Orthodox Jews in their 20s as they navigate the New York dating circuit.

Gottfried grew up attending Orthodox schools in Flatbush, Brooklyn. She told her teachers she dreamed of being an actress; they told her to try again. Source Jen Espada. Gottfried moved with her mother, a writer, to Los Angeles at age

The Jewish fear of intermarriage

A pilot episode, originally devised as a short film, has garnered over 30, views on YouTube in its first two weeks online. The trio is squeezed together on a crowded couch in the lobby of the Ace Hotel in Manhattan, a dimly lit spot that could be summarized through the smartly dressed hipster couple making out a couple of couches away. In a rush, David mistakenly sits with another Sarah, who is expecting a blind date of her own — and, well, comedic consequences ensue.

The three now develop and write all the episodes together.

PDF | The current study investigated the dating attitudes of Ultra-Orthodox Jewish between what is referred to in the Jewish community as ”Modern Orthodox” a regular guy and we were just going out to eat or whatever just to be friends it.

In the middle of a blizzard on the Upper East Side, Chaviva Gordon-Bennett dipped her feet into a ritual bath located in the basement of a building adjacent to her synagogue. A female attendant watched as she descended into the heated water, her terry cloth robe still tied around her waist. Three rabbis stood off to the side of the room, their backs to Gordon-Bennett as she dunked her head under water.

The rabbis took this as their cue to leave. Gordon-Bennett disrobed, handed the soaked garment to the attendant, and dunked twice more. Gordon-Bennett was officially an Orthodox Jew. The ritual bath—known as a mikvah—marked the culmination of her religious conversion. By senior year, Gordon-Bennett had converted to Reform Judaism. Dressed and dried after the mikvah, Gordon-Bennett met the Rabbis in the waiting room, still reeling from the gravity of what had just transpired. The Rabbis handed her a piece of candy—a reward and another test.

Before eating it, she would need to say the specific blessing for candy, in Hebrew. Orthodox Jews say a blessing over every food they eat.

The 16 Types Of Jewish Men You’ll Date In New York

Their connection felt genuine and she was eager to cut out the middleman. Her future husband was less certain and suggested they wait. For instance, a shadchen acting as an intermediary at the beginning of a relationship served Lily in her early 20s, but was less effective as she matured. Lily attributes this disconnect to the reality that shidduch dating was originally intended for people in their late teens and early 20s.

He says that, thanks to his work, 58 couples have gotten engaged.

In modern secular dating couples may live together for a year or two before As the guy is about to get her a drink, she says, “Can I just ask you a question?

I was riding the train with my friend Catherine a few weeks ago, returning to Long Island from a day in Manhattan. Her boyfriend Josh had just broken up with her the day before. The two had started dating while we were still in college, a few weeks before summer break, and she thought things were going well. If you get into a discussion with someone who was raised religiously, you may find that you reach an impasse very quickly.

I should know; I was raised in an Orthodox community and my father is a rabbi. I would like to share my own experiences, without passing judgment on anyone on any side of the interdating issue. I vividly recall being taught once in junior high school about the evils of intermarriage. Our rabbi told us the story of a man living in Germany in the s who married a non-Jew, and how his wife gave him up to the Nazis after Hitler came to power.

Intermarriage was frequently compared to the Holocaust; we were always taught that it meant the end of the Jewish people in the near future. On top of those direct attacks on interfaith relationships, a contrary emphasis was always placed on raising a Jewish family. A common theme is the Norman Rockwell-like image of the father saying the blessing over the wine on Shabbat the Sabbath while the mother, wearing a shawl on her head, covers her eyes and blesses the candles.

Family is the foundation of many of the Jewish traditions and religion is seen as central to marriage. Josh was not choosing between the Orthodox community and Catherine; he was ending the relationship so he would not have to make that choice.

11 Things Jewish Friends Just Get

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